Monday, January 28, 2008

Some Assembly Required


This is one of the most evil phrases known to mankind. From IKEA bedroom furnishings to toys for kids, “some assembly required” is a one way ticket to hell. These days you can’t buy anything without building it yourself at home with the wrong tools, directions written in every language in small font, with at least 25 steps, and of course some pieces missing. I’m a fairly good handyman, but “some assembly required” strikes a chord of irrational fear in me that causes me to avoid buying certain items. In fact, if I buy a bike for my kid I have a choice—“some assembly required” or pay 10 bucks extra for the model that has already been built.
On Christmas Eve and Day people around the nation suffer as they struggle to build the hot wheels set, bedroom furniture, medieval castle, skateboards, etc. Sometimes it takes hours of frustration, minor back pain and eye strain to assemble the item. It seems like a scam to me. The prices aren’t cheaper; they just do less work for the consumer. In the future, will we go to a store to buy a shirt and walk out with some fabric, thread and a needle? How about building a flat-screen t.v. on Christmas Eve in the garage after a few egg nogs? Or walking out of a furniture store with one piece of wood and some instructions. “Some assembly required” translates to “A huge amount of frustrating bullshit is demanded to use this product” or “ripoff.”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow, this was a really quality post. In theory I' d like to write like this too - taking time and actual effort to make a great article... but what can I say... I procrastinate alot and in no way appear to get something done.